Last night, we had a party to celebrate World Down Syndrome Day with our local Down syndrome group. I had been playing on the bouncy house slide with my little sister, and came to sit down for a break and some food. That's when it hit me like a ton of bricks. All the stress of being sick. And then I realized.
I had been happy.
For a half hour, playing with my sister, watching her enjoy life. I had forgotten for awhile how bad I was feeling, and I had been happy and content.
I have been told many times that mental health is a huge part of feeling good and getting better. I knew it was true, but I didn't realize how true it was.
(I don't mean that this disease is in my head. Not by a long shot. I forgot for a half hour about being sick, but I still was weak, feverish, very short of breath, and had a headache. I just wasn't thinking about it and focusing on the negative.)
That little bit of happiness was a breath of fresh air, and as I was thinking about it more later. I realized I haven't been truly happy for a long period of time since I was in Ukraine, in December.
Since Ukraine, I have been dealing with another round of depression, a relapse from when I was feeling great, lots of doctor appts with more diagnoses and lists of things I can't eat, and stress from from non-Lyme related sources.
I should be happy and content for two reasons alone and have no excuses. Those two reasons being God is good, and I am alive. But I'm not happy and content. And I should be.
So today I'm deciding. I choose to work on happiness and contentment. I choose to get closer to my Savior and have him guide me and teach me how to choose JOY.
What do you need to work on in your life? Will you choose joy with me?
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